Many children learn early that obstacles are either there for someone else to deal with, or not worth the trouble. Consequently, too many young people leave school and enter the workplace without a good grasp of what’s possible. Here are 10 ways to teach your children to overcome obstacles:
BE A ROLE MODEL
- Kids learn most of what they know about problem-solving by watching their parents; demonstrate the deep satisfaction that comes with negotiating a challenge
EQUIP THEM WITH THE RIGHT TOOLS
- Impart in them motivation, self-confidence, sound judgment, and experience in solving small problems
PLAY PROBLEM-SOLVING GAMES AS A FAMILY
- Scavenger hunts, board games, word puzzles help kids understand that obstacles are an important element of life
UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “CHILDHOOD” AND “IRRELEVANCY”
- Some parents don’t offer responsibility or the respect of expectation – avoid this by making children an integral part of family life, and that they have something of value to contribute
PROVIDE CHILDREN WITH PRACTICE
- Introduce obstacles that kids can deal with (plan family outings, work out details on vacations, etc.), teach them how to develop strategy, encourage them to persevere; and then make a big deal of it when they succeed
DO NOT REINFORCE GIVING UP
- Never solve a problem for your child that they can (with guidance) solve themselves
- Encourage them so that “hanging in there” for success is experienced as much more rewarding than conceding defeat
BE THERE WHEN FAILURE THREATENS TO OVERWHELM
- There is no benefit to abandoning children to failure when the struggle is huge
- Can you steer them toward success, then back off? Or counsel with them when an obstacle simply will not budge?
FACILITATE SOLUTION-ORIENTED CONVERSATIONS AT THE FAMILY TABLE
- Ask for your child’s input when seeking solutions to family issues, e.g., where to go on vacation
VOLUNTEER WITH YOUR CHILDREN
- Participate in community or church projects that call for creative thinking
DON’T FORGET BALANCE
Sometimes it’s appropriate to ask for help when an obstacle won’t budge; don’t let your children confuse stubbornness with tenacity
Source: workingmother.com (June 7, 2019)